So, here is a review of Chaos A.D. by the Brazilian metal band, Sepultura (RW#2, 1994). The review is silly enough, of course, but for some reason "Malcolm Tent" also included a review of two made-up bands. This sort of thing was probably the reason nobody really liked or read the Reglar Wiglar when it showed up on the floors of record stores around Chicago in the early 90s. "Cyberpunk" was a thing for a minute back then, so I guess that might explain some of the 3Jane stuff, that and the fact that I had just read William Gibson's Neuromancer book. Who knows. Please, try to enjoy it.
SEPULTURA
Chaos A.D. (Roadrunner)
INSYNUATOR
Industrial Espionage (Metalli-Sized)
3JANE
The Sprawl (Virtual)
I got the shits, dude, so I ain't in the best of moods
right now. Never mix Milwaukee's Best with PBR, man. It just ain't worth it.
Two fine brews should be savored independently of each other. See, I knew that
already but when I was at the liquor store apparently a couple of cases of MB
got fucked up and busted and so did a case of Blue Ribbon so, George, the liquor
store dude, who I don't think his real name is George because he's got this
really fucked up accent and I just don't think they name people George where
he comes from, but anyway, he like had this grab bag thing goin' where he just
threw 12 cans of brew into a box and it cost $4.99 for whatever the hell was
in the box (there was one can of Lite beer in there too, which I have no clue
whatsoever on how that puppy got in thee, but the old lady was spendin' the
night so I didn't even have to deal with it, that's chick beer). So, don't mix
yer pilsners, man, or else you'll be writtin' your record reviews from the toilet
like yours truly here. I don't know though, sometimes I think this is where
I think best, right here on the John Crapper. What a name, imagine the odds
of the man that invented the toilet was not only named John but John Crapper,
that's fucked up.
Anyway, the review; I actually have several records to review.
The first one is Chaos AD by those godhead, Sepultura, Chaos AD is a really good record. It's got some songs on it that are better than some
of the others, for example "Territory" (cool video) is better than
"Biotech is Godzilla" and "Slave New World" is cooler than
"Propaganda", but all the songs are good and you should definitely
buy this CD or the album or cassette, depending on what kind of stereo you own.
If you ride out the CD there is some maniacal cackling recorded at the very
tail end that will be sure to freak your neighbors' shit
Another record I would like to review is Insynuator, whom I
believe will have an interview with Muggsy McMuphy running in this same issue,
which is why I was asked to review their last record which actually came out
three or four years ago. This is a good record. It has some really super awesome
songs on it and some fairly good tunes as well. Some songs on this record, titled Industrial Espionage, that rock are songs like "We Who Rock Harder
Than Others" and "War Zone 91." You should get this one too
A band called 3Jane, from somewhere in California have a debut
record called the Sprawl. It's cool Cyberpunk, better than Billy Idol's
new tunes. There's tunes on it called "Sally Shears," "Jack In"
and "Ice Breaker," just to give you an idea of what this record is
all about.
Wow, they ask for one record review, didn't think I could meet
their deadline, and then I crank out three reviews, hah! 'Til later on kids.
Bye–Malcolm Tent